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Click here for options! On the Fourth of July, my wife, Cheryl, in keeping with her favorite holiday activity, was watching an old film, “Barefoot in the Park,” on a cable channel. It starred Jane Fonda, long before her political days, and Robert Redford, long before he was a patron of the arts with his Sundance Film Festival.
I had seen the film, probably at the Family Drive-In on Broadway in my long-ago youth. I didn’t like it much then, and I don’t care for old movies in general. Cheryl, on the other hand, likes old movies, especially musicals like “The Sound of Music” because they tend to be less graphic and more romantic than today’s fare.
One of the reasons I don’t like old movies is that they are not realistic. A good romance is fine, but I like it served up gritty and true to life, which does not include actors breaking into song spontaneously. The other reason I don’t like old movies — or television shows — is they never are as good as I remembered them.
When my son was considerably younger, I ran across a copy of the film “Billy Jack” starring Tom Laughlin as a former Green Beret and Vietnam veteran and Delores Taylor as the director of a free school for troubled teens of all races. Billy Jack stands up to the forces of evil and bigotry, protecting the school and its students. I brought the videotape home, put it in the VCR with much fanfare and asked Paris to watch it with me.
Fifteen minutes into the film, I realized how bad the acting, directing and technical aspects of the film really were. My son the film hobbyist knew it was bad before I did. It was actually Laughlin’s second Billy Jack film.
The first was called “Born Losers,” in which Billy Jack took on a motorcycle gang. There was a third film called “The Trial of Billy Jack,” awaited with much fanfare by fans who had developed something of a cult following. I don’t remember seeing that one or “Billy Jack Goes to Washington.
” In 1992, Laughlin confused his film persona with real life and ran unsuccessfully for the Democratic nomination for president as a populist hero and then again as a Republican in 2004. There is talk among die-hard Billy Jack fans that there will be yet another movie called “Billy Jack’s Moral Revolution,” shortened from the original title of “Billy Jack’s Crusade to End the War in Iraq and Restore America to Its Moral Purpose.” Sometimes it pays to quit while you’re at the top of your game.
The best parts of the original Billy Jack films were the martial arts scenes in which the hero whipped up on bad guys. Laughlin is now about 76 years old, and it’s doubtful he can fake being a hapkido master these days. While I don’t begrudge Cheryl’s interest in old films, they can’t hold my attention very long.
But a good marriage is, to a large degree, a matter of learning to be tolerant and respectful. I attend her social functions without complaint, and she attends mine, but we spend most of our free time alone, even though we’re usually involved in separate enterprises. She works sudoku and crossword puzzles, and I read, write or watch unrealistic crime shows so I can ridicule the technical errors.
We dine out a lot and enjoy our grandchildren together. We attended a Fourth of July party on the evening of July 3 but were home by 10:15 p.m.
because our German shepherd is frightened by thunder and other loud noises, and we knew some neighbors would be shooting off fireworks at midnight — drought conditions and the law notwithstanding — and we wanted to get Angel in before it started. One of the differences between men and boys is the size of the pyrotechnic devices they can afford. By the standards of some, Cheryl and I lead a dull existence.
Both of us, however, have had quite enough of rushing around and being held captive by clocks and schedules. Not having to do anything we don’t want to do on a given day is good. I wouldn’t trade our free times for a book on the New York Times Bestseller list.
Not that there’s any danger of that at the moment. David Hunter, who writes this column for the News Sentinel, is a freelance writer and former Knox County sheriff’s deputy. You may write him at P.
O. His e-mail address is davidhunter333@comcast.net.
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