On TV, 1 p.m.

"Idol"! "Dancing!" Two shows enter, one show leaves .

.. at least for the first few minutes.

Post TV columnist Lisa de Moraes will be online Friday, March 23, at 1 p.m. ET to break down the latest "reality" TV twists, explain the TV Academy's new "no Ellen Burstyns allowed" rule, and maybe even address the fatwa The Post's Joel Achenbach has issued: (washingtonpost.

com, March 21).
Read the latest TV column: (Post, March 22) De Moraes has written "The TV Column" for The Post since 1998. She served as the TV editor for the entertainment industry trade publication the "Hollywood Reporter" for almost a decade.

before or during today's discussion.
I was just reading on the "Idol" Web site (Don't ask -- I admit I was bored and looking for pictures of her "shoes"). Can we perhaps manufacture a scandal that Haley names a Canadian ("Celine Dion -- of course") as her personal "American Idol"?

Haley Scarnato #33
Lisa de Moraes: Hi. I think that once you set up semi-permanent residence in Las Vegas you're American whether you like it or not..

. What was up with Phil's shirt the other night? It looked like he had a bad ironing accident.

It was bizarre (so was his performance).
Lisa de Moraes: He was sweating through his shirt -- it was pretty soaked by the end of his song. That's what they get for putting him in polyester.

. Poor boy was very nervous after being in the bottom tier previous week. I didn't think his performance was half bad -- I know, damning with faint praise.

Do you watch "Gene Simmons: Family Jewels"? I am hard-pressed to understand why a nice and beautiful woman like Shannon Tweed would continue to stay with His Pigness.
Lisa de Moraes: That's so easy, silly #33 $$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$ Hey, Pookster -- now that the New York Times on Ann Curry and respected Timesman Nicholas D.

Kristof has praised her, can you lay off the cheap shots? Yeah, she may read the news on the "Today" show (I'm not sure why that's such a bad thing, although I will give you that "Dateline" is a bad thing), but she has done great work and shown great depth and courage in Darfur, where few journalists have ventured -- and last time I checked, going to Darfur is a tad harder than watching TV. (Sorry for the cheap shot -- I still have you bookmarked and still love reading your stuff every single day.

)
Lisa de Moraes: Sadly for you, I do not take my cues from the New York Times. I do, however, cringe when highly paid news on-air talent compares herself in any way to people who risked their lives helping Jews during the Holocuast..

. Thanks so much for your "Idol" column this week -- it proves just how bloated and full-of-itself the show has become. I'm afraid, though, that it is too late to reign it back in; I am doomed to having Constantine's picture beam at me from a wall in my house, and to having my wife spend gobs of money and travel hundreds of miles to see Taylor Hicks "perform.

"
Lisa de Moraes: Aren't there groups that do "Idol" interventions on obsessed wifes? If there aren't, there should be..

. And what do you mean about Constantine's pix beaming at you from a wall in your house. I know he's been hired by some network to host an "Idol" recap show and that his face is one of many that appears in the "Idol" opener.

Please tell me you don't actually have a picture of him in your house...

Jackie Warner and "Work Out" is back and better than ever #33 Her loony-tunes girlfriend, Mimi, and the usual cast of trainer hotties. I was distressed to see the first episode was "in memory of Doug Blasdell," one of the trainers. Do you know anything about his untimely passing?

Lisa de Moraes: No, I regret I have dropped the ball on the important trainer hotties aspect of my job...

let's check Wikipedia for the "facts"...

.. Awww, I almost cried during "Friday Night Lights" when Tyra's mom drove her to the school and danced with her at the father-daughter dance -- you see, Tyra's dad isn't in the picture, so her mom is her dad too #33 Even though she doesn't do a great job all the time, she's trying.

Lisa de Moraes: ..and, of course, it hurts pretty people more, because they're, um, pretty.

Well, Pookie, have you finally realized this is not a jock show? This week was a first ..

. an entire episode without even a hint of a football game. They have so many plates spinning now there is no time for football #33 Are you on-board, Pookster?

Lisa de Moraes: No, but I am at least sampling. And, as any crack dealer will tell you, once you're sampling, you're more than half way there..

. I was forgetting why I used to hate NBC so much, and then I was reminded that they claimed to own the intellectual property rights to the name "Larry (Bud) Melman." How petty.

(Post, March 22)
Lisa de Moraes: NBC and CBS and Letterman were locked in a pretty unpleasant battle back then over what Letterman could and could not take with him to CBS. And, remember, Letterman was the ratings leader..

. sigh. I don't care if it was kinda a plant -- I thought the whole thing was brilliant TV.

It made the whole show for me. I think those producers are geniuses #33
Lisa de Moraes: I am so with you on this. For those of you who missed it, we're talking about little Ashley, the pigtailed cutie who was "caught" on camera sobbing when Sanjaya Malakar got crazy doing a Kinks song on "Idol" this week.

The buzz is the producers put her in her chair because they'd seen her crying buckets during the rehearsals that afternoon. How is that different than nature documentary producers waiting to get the shot of the cute little baby pandas because they know we can't resist cute little pandas? I rest my case.

.. Any idea when they're going to air the leftover "Studio 60" episodes?

Even if it's canceled for next year, won't they go ahead and show the ones they already have made for this season?
Lisa de Moraes: Maybe, unless they think they can make more money by not airing them and putting the whole season on, say Bravo, which NBC/Universal/2.0 also owns, and promoting the heck out of the fact that you can see the "lost" episodes only on Bravo.

Or something like that. But they'll pop up somewhere -- DVD, etc..

. Good catch on those shoes she was wearing They were killer, and I thought I saw them on a commercial too
Lisa de Moraes: Oh, you mean her actual shoes, not her "shoes." You confused me for a minute.

Yes, I pay careful attention to the ads on this show, and many other shows...

. Sad to say there is a picture, framed, in the house. It's soooo embarrasing, but at least it's not Seacrest.

Out.
Lisa de Moraes: You need to accidentally knock it over into the kitchen sink disposal, pookie. ASAP.

Then, get yourself an intervention...

"Friday Night Lights" -- Yes, but...

: it has joined the legions of shows (I'm talking to you "CSI" and "Law Order") that has to find a way to work a strip club into the plot.
Lisa de Moraes: Do you mean to tell me it has not already? TWO whole sweeps have gone by since this show debuted and NO strip-club scene even though the show is about football-and-so-much-more?

That's just shoddy writing...

.FYI at a presentation NBC suits gave yesterday to advertisers about their development for next season, they touted "FNL" as one of their series that speak to what the network is all about. So I'd say it's a certainty this one will be back.

.. There, I said it out loud.

Is there some hot line I should call or something?
Lisa de Moraes: It appears, based on comments I'm getting on this chat, there are many people needing "Idol" intervention. I can only assume that before long "Idol" Intervention therapists will be springing up all around the country.

When they do, I will jump on it in the column...

"Ugly Betty" -- I realize we're expected to root for a Betty/Henry pairing, but does anyone else find him a little creepy? Like last night, when he knew every single little detail about her life? That's getting into restraining-order territory.

Lisa de Moraes: No. You are wrong. Very very wrong.

Women expect guys to know every single little detail about their lives...

did you not get the memo? Trivia question -- why do some channels start regular programming at a few minutes off the hour (say, 10:02 instead of 10 like everyone else)? I've only noticed because it comes up on my digital cable.

Is it a ratings trick?
Lisa de Moraes: Usually that's because the show that ran long is a hit show and the network is trying to get an extra ad break into that show so that ad break will be sold at hit-series prices instead of less-hit-series prices, if you know what I mean..

. And, if they can mess up your DVR recording, so much the better. Turns out, they'd rather you streamed the whole episode on their web site than DVR it because on the stream you can't zap through the ads but on your TiVo or whatever it is you've got, you can.

.. pretty sneaky, huh?

Lisa de Moraes: Yes, she did...

. I'm submitting early because I want to know but might be busy this afternoon. Is "Six Degrees" back for good or are they just getting rid of episodes already filmed?

What about "Men in Trees" -- is it gone too? How is "October Road" doing?
Lisa de Moraes: "October Road" is doing well -- last night snagged abotu 12.

3 million viewers. Granted, "Grey's Anatomy," its leadin, averaged nearly 22 million, but it's about the same leadin retention as it had done previous week after "Greys'." Now, "Men in Trees" is one of the shows ABC announced the other day it had already ordered back for next season, so you can rest easy on that one too.

Sadly, "Six Degrees" was not on that list, so it's not looking great for that show to come back after this batch of episodes...

Can I go on "The Great American Dream Vote" and get a chance to have my dream come true? I want "Knights of Prosperity" back #33
Lisa de Moraes: Yeah, good luck on that one..

.. I have had it with Gina Glocksen -- "rocker chick" she is not.

She has professed on more than one occasion that her own "Idol" is Celine Dion #33 What, she's a badass because she shops at Hot Topic and dyes her hair? She carries around freakin' troll dolls and tiny stuffed animals, for smurf's sake #33 She purported to introduce the world and the judges to the "real" Gina a few weeks back by singing an Evanescence song #33 Evanescence is to rock as K-Fed is to gangsta rap #33 She is a phony and a pain in the butt and completely talentless. I am so glad the judges reamed her the other night for even attempting to mess with "Paint it Black.

"
Lisa de Moraes: She too worships the Canadian? Really, these people are as dumb as the contestants on "5th Grader.".

.. Of course, there is that whole "United States is not the only America" argument I keep hearing from my Brazilian aunt.

.. My husband and my neighbor both think Betty is going to get it on with Daniel.

I think that would be really cool, but I like Henry. What do you think? Menage a trois?

Lisa de Moraes: I'm thinking we need only dig up the scripts to the original telenovela to find out...

If you were in the "Idol" audience, you would cry too, wouldn't you?
Lisa de Moraes: Of course -- but I get emotional at the grocery store if the fish still have their heads on..

.. Does the awesomeness of Eddie Izzard make up for the suck that is Minnie Driver?

Lisa de Moraes: You don't like FX's new "The Riches"? I thought they were both good. I miss Eddie Izzard doing standup comedy because he's the very best there is.

But, alas, he wants to be a "thespian" and we must respect that...

The newspaper industry is having a great loss in its coverage of television with the Philadelphia Inguirer shutting down Gail Shister. I always thought you and Ms. Shister were the two best in the business.

(Philadelphia Daily News, March 22)
Lisa de Moraes: They did not shut her down -- they shut down her column and she will continue to cover television, from a pop-culture point of view, by doing feature stories, according to the editor quoted in the Philly Daily News story about this development. It would appear, based on those comments, the higher ups at PI thought her column -- which was very devoted to the networks' news operations and news on-air talent -- was too narrowly focused. Though I'm sure that's a great loss to the news people who were profiled and quoted in her column.

"Idol": Is this the best talent America has to offer?: The answer is no, it is not. For proof, watch this Sunday's finale of "Grease" on NBC.

If they bring back their top 12, you'll see that every one of the 12 is better than almost everyone on "Idol." And "Nashville Star" consistently has a more talented group of finalists. I have to wonder if all those people that "Idol" kicked out on the fist day of Hollywood week were really worse than what we ended up with.

I think "Idol needs to tweak its selection process a bit.
Lisa de Moraes: Really? I think this is one of the most fun seasons yet.

Who cares if they pick the best talent America has to offer? This is a TV show -- I just want people who will amuse me and a couple who are great singers. This season has all that.

And, based on last season, it doesn't even matter who wins. Chris Daughtry is more successful selling CDs than winner Taylor Hicks, so far. So everybody wins.

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