My dog Zach's friends, George, Martin, Frank and Dave all have human-sounding names. They have single, female owners, too and I wonder if there's a connection. Are these pooches human family replacements in a part of the city where singledom and sole occupancy prevails?

Certainly, I'm so devoted to my dog I've been asked if he's a child substitute. He isn't - he's a dog, but I can see the attraction of that concept if you want to save on school fees and avoid all the worry about emos and Internet gatecrashers. Then again, I still think making children is more fun than buying dogs.

Two of my friends claim their choice of plain, bloke names for their canines is protection against a feared stereotype. Perhaps it all began with Mrs Slocombe and her pussy, or maybe we can blame Bridget Jones (I blame her for most things - she even gave Chardonnay a bad name), who feared she'd die alone and be found half-eaten by an Alsatian, but pets and single women do seem destined to attract more than their share of ridicule. Cats, especially, are treated as some sort of dirty secret and many women would rather reveal the existence of a dungeon in the basement or a collection of those dolls that fit over toilet rolls than a feline housemate.

"People assume if you have a cat on your lap, you've got a rabbit boiling in the kitchen," says one very sane, Persian-owning friend. It doesn't seem fair that people remember Mrs Slocombe and her pussy in Are You Being Served? but conveniently forget crazy, cat-stroking Dr No in the James Bond movies.

Or that no-one thought it strange when my friend Iain used to share his bed with a giant rabbit called Attila the Bun, but eyebrows are raised when a local lady takes her Chihuahua, Frank Sinatra, for a walk in his Versace-inspired wet-weather ensemble (all right, that is a bit much. In fact it's unforgivable and heinous). When a man bonds with Flipper, Skippy or Lassie, it's the stuff of prime-time TV adventure.

When women and pets appear, it's the witching hour or a bad sitcom. As someone who's fond of men and animals, I'm baffled by the notion you can't have both. Sometimes, in bleaker moments, I've wondered if it reflects a more general resentment of the close bonds women form with their kids, friends and families.

Women who love a lot are always judged more harshly than passionate men. They're more likely to be branded wacky, scary or even dangerous. And although today's blokes are more comfortable with their feelings than ever before, we still applaud every emotional display - even if it's just whistling to the budgie - as a step up the evolutionary ladder.

Anyway, bet you didn't know this: Czechoslovakian scientists have discovered a parasite passed on by cats can change women's behaviour so they feel sexy, desirable and adventurous. If their findings are true, those old ladies with 12 moggies and dotty reputations are probably juggling so many toyboys they're simply having trouble remembering what day it is. So far, there's no antidote for the bug, and I'm not sure there should be.

If man, woman and cat can live in greater harmony, then there's hope for all species. In the meantime, you can lend your support to that Utopian vision and, more importantly, the people who help animals who aren't loved as much as Zach, Dave, George, Frank and Martin by heading to the RSPCA's Paws for Celebration Dinner on Friday July 20th, at Doltone House in Pyrmont. It'll be full of animal people of both genders, and one of the best-known supporters of the event is TV personality Laura Csortan, who's an owner and foster parent to rescue dogs as well as a pretty decent ambassador for single girls with furry families.

With a 'walk on the wild side' theme, it's the perfect setting for some animated discussion of all of the above. See you there. terms and conditions.

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