Hello everyone. Nice to see you. The "y" button on my laptop isn't working so well, so forgive any typos.

br / br / Things are going well - work is good, home is good (when I'm there, which isn't as often as I like but will probably be more now), I'm feeling satisfied with a lot of things, and I'm writing again, which is always good. March is alwas a shitty month, and I'll be glad to see the back end of it and possibly put my boot up its ass, but I think April will be even better. br / br / Tomorrow is supposed to be 73 degrees, and I plan on spending my entire lunch hour outside, breathing in air that doesn't come back out as vapors, that doesn't make your chest ache.

Sitting on a marble bench that isn't so cold it burns your skin through your clothes. Oh, spring! Where the fuck have you been?

br / br / In less happy news, Raul and Julia are gone, and walking into their old office and i not /i seeing them there kind of squishes my soul every morning. I expect to walk in a and wish my favorite customer service team hello, but now it's just Rob. And he's always cranky.

Well, he's not always cranky, but he always i looks /i cranky. *snerk* I miss you guys already, though, seriously. I walked down Steinway past your place and couldn't believe that if I just went over and rang the bell, you wouldn't be there to buzz me in.

br / br / I would be afeared that the Astoria crew would start to fade out of my life, but I just agreed to help out with a rather time-intensive project so hopefully that will put my fears to rest. It's completely irrational, but there's always that worry when you've infiltrated someone's group of friends that their leaving will dissolve any ties you had to that group. I don't actually think that'll happen, but that's what makes it irrational.

Shut up. You all know what I mean. I'm allowed to girl out every now and then.

br / br / What else, what else. I'm working on a submission for an anthology, and if I can get what's in my head to actually be on the paper, I think I have a decent chance at getting it published. It's interesting a dark and sexual without being tasteless (not that I write a lot of tasteless things, but I recognize that in short story fiction, there's a i very /i fine fucking line).

I just need to find time to write it - I haven't had more than a half hour to sit and fuck around on the computer in weeks. Maybe I'll bring my laptop and work on it at lunch tomorrow. In the delicious warm weather.

Yes. *purrs* br / br / Also, I want to marry Titus Pollo and smoke cigars with him on a beach in Monte Carlo. That is all.

To paraphrase a conversation with Raul, today I got my tax return, quit my job, scheduled a body rub and massage and facial for tomorrow, booked a cruise, and now I'm buying underwear online. In about two hours I'm going to have ex-coworkers buying me drinks 'til I get wasted, then I'm having dinner at Veselka and going to a very good friend's comedy show.

If I make out with someone, this may be the best day of the decade. br / br / Man, kissing boys on New Year's really i does /i make it a better year! This song is seriously awesome. Too pop-y for my usual tastes, but the lyrics are so clever I can't help but love it.

Especially since I am a girl in sales and marketing, and I like making out. And also, snost and lost? Brilliant.

br / br / That was not how I planned on opening this entry. Dammit, Mike. I was supposed to open it with a whine about the headcold reaching the point where I am now both dizzy and nauseous along with the horrible sinus pressure, headache, slightly achy-sore throat, and inability to form coherent thought for more than 20 second stretches.

I was actually kind of worried, since I've never had a headcold and rarely ever get sick, and these symptoms seem a bit drastic for a simple virus, but Bill assured me that the dizziness/nausea is perfectly normal because my ears are all stuffed up. Which makes sense. I just wish I had the option of going to a doctor.

*sigh* Stupid job. br / br / Someone should come make me chicken soup, and possibly curl up in the bed with me. I have plenty of new movies, and I took a bath a few minutes ago, so I smell like lavender shampoo and green tea bath soak.

I'm not sure if that means I smell like a fresh summer day, or a hippie. I'm gonna go with the summer day. br / br / Ohmigod, make the spinning room and throbbing head stop!

I've gotta lie down. Blech. for the drunk I have going on right now.

The worst is that my stepdad fed me two bowls of coffee before feeding me rum, so not only am I pissing every five minutes, I can't sleep. Wheeeeee! br / br / I got my ass kicked in cards again, though I was very close this year.

But then again, I'm very close very year. :) br / br / Tomorrow I have four people who are willing to help me clean up for the party, which makes me very happy indeed. I'd also like to say that I'm typing without looking at the keyboard at all, because my stepdad just popped in i Little Miss Sunshine /i and is trying to convince me it's the best movie ever.

Grampa is doing coke right now, so I think the chances of me agreeing are pretty good. br / br / I love you, Tony Collette. Steve Carrell is crazy looking, though.

br / br / Done! Hate!

I hate this new update window. It's all..

.. crazy.

My screen's huge anyway, so the update box looks like it's a mile wide. I haven't even hit the end yet. br / br / Not a whole lot going on.

I'm trying desperately not to spend money (I've figured out that if I don't get ahead of myself and get some money in my savings account, I'm probably going to end up in a very bad situation) but this has coincided with two pairs of pants finally getting too pilled to wear, and winter coming with its need for warmer clothing than I own. In fact, if all of my friend's list want to pool their efforts and buy me something for Christmas, a href="http://www.oldnavy.

com/browse/product.do?cid=29916 pid=436194" this super-cheap winter jacket /a would be awesome.

Size 2X to leave room for my bulky delicious sweaters. I'll take white. I don't care.

I just want something that is not a sweatshirt. :P Just putting that out there! br / br / Speaking of which, what does everyone want for Christmas/Jew-Present Days?

After reading Michelle's entry about a book-swap among family, I'm thinking that might not be a bad idea for all of us -- we all like saving money, and we all have too many books! If anyone is interested, leave a comment here. People not in New York are cool to comment too, since MediaMail is all of $1.

50 and I think we can handle that. :) br / br / Still not sure what I'm doing for the holidays. My family wants me to come to Delaware, but I'd rather visit them for New Years than for Christmas.

But then again, there are rumors going around that we might be doing something maybe possibly for New Years, but it's only two weeks away and we have no plans, so I'm not sure if that's actually gonna happen. Plus I wanted to spend New Years with Raul and Julia, so I might end up having to spend Christmas with the family whether I want to or not. Gah.

What I really want to do for Christmas is disconnect the cable and spend the entire three-day weekend by myself in the apartment, cleaning and finishing my room and rearranging furniture and hanging shelves and doing all the shit I flat-out haven't had time or energy or inclination to do in the past few months. I mean, Christmas weekend is the first weekend I haven't had plans for both days since probably August or September. Which is not to say I don't love hanging out with you lovely people, it's just that mommy needs some time to herself.

Then again, when I have nights free, I generally call people up or end up making last minute plans with people. So maybe I don't really want to be alone as much as I think. Maybe I need some fucking crazy pills.

Gah. br / br / Nelson has flaked out on me, and I'm not sure if he's in the hospital or just doesn't want to talk to me. The not wanting to talk to me part being entirely i not /i my fault.

I'm totally willing to talk to him. In fact, I'd love to talk to him about that wire transfer of money that he said he sent to my account, paying me back the couple hundred dollars I lent to him to get him through the move almost three weeks ago, the subsequent non-payment of which made my rent check bounce. Lovelovelove to talk about that.

Alas, no answer. Apparently you can't trust soon-to-be millionaire cancer-ridden Cubans with money. And that's the lesson for today.

br / br / My complete and utter nonchalance towards having my rent check bounce is kind of concerning, though. I mean, that's the kind of thing you get upset about, right? The kind of thing you have strong emotions about?

The kind of thing you at least think about for a little while instead of just shrugging your shoulders and saying "Meh"? Maybe it's time to find someone with a prescription pad before my insurance goes all to hell with the New Year. Meh.

br / br / Office party tonight! The red dress I ordered was not at all what I thought it would be and ended up being totally innappropriate for an office party. But not for one of my house parties I suppose.

*snerk* Went out and got a quick outfit, though, at an extremely reasonable price -- and which I can wear to work later, solving the problem of one pair of pants I needed. I also got some tights so I can wear my corduroy skirt again without freezing my legs off. Woot.

See what I mean about spending money, though? Rent check bounced and the next day I'm buying tights. Jesus.

I can't i wait /i to get shitfaced tonight...

br / br / And the funny thing is, I'm actually in a damned good mood today. I think I really am getting a little nuts. But I'm still adorable and sassy, and that's what counts!