This weekend marks a special occasion. Tufts alumni will come from far and wide and undergrads will drunkenly stumble down to the hardly-ever-visited football field to watch the Tufts football team battle the ruthless Bowdoin Polar Bears. Sounds epic, doesn't it?
In the spirit of homecoming, we have compiled a list of celebratory, laudable, epic homecomings. That way, just in case your Jumbo enthusiasm doesn't involve attending sporting events, when Saturday rolls around you'll have 10 un-sports-related homecomings to drink to. 1.
Odysseus: This guy had perhaps the longest and hardest road home of anyone in the history of mankind. After fighting a war, the poor man just wants to go home to his wife, but instead gets swept away on a journey that includes lotus-eating, cyclopses, enchantresses, cattle from hell and many, many sacrificial lambs. And, after all that, the dude still finds his wife being pursued by that jerk Antinous.
2. The Wizard of Oz (1939): Despite the awesomeness of flying monkeys, Munchkins and singing animals, Dorothy spends all of her time in Oz trying to return home to Kansas. Guess there really is "no place like home" - even if home is a black and white farm in the middle of nowhere.
3. Salmon: Every year salmon march in Mother Nature's homecoming parade. Those sporty and delicious fish swim upstream and return to the rivers in which they were born to make little salmon babies.
Sadly, this natural homecoming ends morbidly for Pacific salmon who die after spawning. Waaaaaah. 4.
Now and Then (1995): Four childhood best friends reunite in their hometown in this '90s feel-good, retro, chick flick. At this homecoming, the four ladies discover that they no longer have anything in common but chill in a tree house for awhile reminiscing about a time when they did. Plus, a post-"Casper" (1995), pre-Eminem music video Devon Sawa bares his butt on screen for a precious few seconds.
5. Prodigal Son: In what is one of the most famous homecomings in the Bible, a son who has spent his youth chasing women, fame, and money returns home after seeing the folly of his wanton ways. What's the best part of this story?
When the prodigal son returns home, they celebrate with the slaughtering of a 'fatted calf.' And we think throwing a few beers back constitutes a quality celebration? Traditions these days just don't have enough sacrifices anymore.
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