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Movies: Summer blockbusters fill multiplexes, but empty our heads

We went, we saw, we ate popcorn
Penny Ditch  |  by www.sltrib.com. All rights reserved. 19.07 | 4:17

We went, we saw, we ate popcorn. The "Summer of Threes" kicked off in May with three blockbuster franchise pictures, each on their third installment - "Spider-Man 3," "Shrek the Third" and "Pirates of the Caribbean: At World's End" - and moviegoers flocked to them. On its opening weekend, "Spider-Man 3" nabbed 151.

1 million, a record for a three-day opening. Two weeks later, "Shrek the Third" took in 121.6 million, the highest three-day opening ever for an animated movie.

Last weekend, "Pirates" earned 153 million over four days (or five, since they counted the Thursday-night preview screenings). "Spider-Man 3" has already crossed the 300 million threshold, and the other two will do the same soon. That's good news for the studios that bankrolled these movies, the corporations that own those studios, and the shareholders who own stock in those companies.

For starters, few would deny that these three third-chapter installments were the weakest films in their respective franchises - and for similar reasons: Too bloated with big action sequences, too many new characters, and scripts afraid to stray from the tried-and-true.

Gwen Stacy, an internal struggle with his dark side - plus musical numbers. * "Shrek the Third" kept the vengeful Prince Charming past his scheduled exit, and added a bevy of princesses to join Fiona.

And, like the previous films, it works on the simple motto: "When in doubt, go for the fart joke." * "Pirates of the Caribbean: At World's End," at a bladder-busting two hours and 47 minutes, turned the action knob to 11, which was more tiring than exhilarating. After introducing yet another pirate captain (played by Chow Yun-Fat) to challenge Johnny Depp's Capt.

Jack Sparrow and Geoffrey Rush's Capt. Barbossa, it gave us scenes with multiple Jacks - a gag that delivered diminshing returns with repetition. These three films pretty much filled up the multiplexes this weekend, often taking up several screens per building.

For example, a 16-screen theater in Provo this weekend played only six movies. This saturation booking makes business sense - look what it did for the Megaplex theaters at Jordan Commons and The District, which led the nation in box-office receipts for "Pirates' " opening weekend. But it's not what we, as moviegoers, were promised when multiplexes started sprouting across the landscape: The opportunity to choose from a wide variety of movies.

Contrary to public opinion, movie critics aren't naturally opposed to blockbuster movies. In fact, most critics within a loud shout of 40 will list the original "Star Wars" among their seminal moviegoing experiences. But critics are paid to see the little movies as well as the big ones - and we know that there's more out there than blockbusters, so we act like parents trying to convince their children that a new dish is just as tasty as the grilled-cheese sandwich they always choose.

But critics have to realize, as Premiere magazine's Glenn Kenny told me recently, that what they want isn't always what the public wants. "Movie critics, a lot of the time, tend to look at people as solitary seekers of esthetic experience," Kenny said. "For a lot of people, movies are a social experience, a family experience, and in that case the criteria are slightly different for the lone cinephile.

" Movies are like other commodities. People don't want any unpleasant surprises when they go to "Spider-Man 3" or "Shrek the Third" or another "Pirates of the Caribbean" movie - just as they don't go to McDonald's because they want a great burger, but to get the same burger they had yesterday. There's comfort in the embrace of the familiar.

But that comfort comes at a price. With fast food, it's empty calories. With franchise movies, it's empty-headed entertainment.

Sure, we'll eat it up - but are we nourished? * SEAN P. MEANS writes the daily blog, "The Movie Cricket," at http://blogs.

sltrib.com/movies. Send questions or comments to Sean P.

Means, movie critic, The Salt Lake Tribune, 90 S. 400 West, Suite 700, Salt Lake City, UT 84101, or e-mail at movies@sltrib.com.

Read more on by www.sltrib.com. All rights reserved.
Keywords: Spider Man, s End, s Capt, World s, Sean p, Caribbean At World, At World s, Caribbean At, At World, World s End
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