TLC rates city on fashionability To women headed to their office jobs dressed like pole dancers -- cease and desist! For the No. 1 fashion felony, we have this bulletin: Individuals squeezed full-to-bursting into clothing that is sizes too small -- stop, please, before someone gets hurt.
Admittedly, temps have soared into the 90s this summer. True, our city fancies itself a beach town in fleeting summer. And there are plenty of other excuses: The ultra-casual dot-com influence, the slippery slope of Casual Fridays, younger workers with different influences and expectations.
But save the rest for the judge, will ya, and take a look in the mirror. Ask yourself, honestly, do any charges in this multicount indictment stick to you? Court is in session with Chicago image consultant Barbara Glass and Sara Jane Plocker of the Sara Jane boutique in Old Town.
Too short, too tight, too low-cut or see-through. I see girls with gi-normous boobs in halter tops with everything hanging out," laments Plocker. "It might be fine for someone's backyard cocktail party on Saturday night but for the office it's totally inappropriate.
" Solution 1: "Go one size bigger. "Exposure is a major problem," Glass agrees. "People are getting their ideas from pop culture.
That doesn't fly unless you're on a fashion runway. We are not celebrities. We need to dress with professionalism.
Dress for the position you aspire to. Do you want to dress like the CEO or somebody in the mailroom?" "It is too low-cut," Michelle Hassan admitted of her beige knit top she wore on a recent steamy day.
"I noticed when I was talking with my boss, she looked down." The 36-year-old mother of two buys "double-duty" clothes she can wear to work in the Chicago Board of Education's "education to careers" program and for dressy occasions. Solution 2: Keep cleavage under cover by layering a shirt underneath a strappy top; add a jacket, shrug or sweater on top.
Grown men dressed like professional skateboarders; grown women who look like they raided their daughters' closets. This is jarring. Plocker just had his conversation with a friend.
They decided that dressing "young," instead of making people look younger, calls attention to your age. Plus, it can startle people approaching from behind. "Please, no Hawaiian shirts," Glass says.
"They're as distracting as a woman wearing a low-cut shirt. There's a time and place for it. Like if you are an actual Hawaiian.
" Instead: "In 'Oceans 13,' look at Brad Pitt and George Clooney. They are wearing jackets the whole time, tie, open neck, no chains, no jewelry, great haircuts. This is what men should aspire to.
" "You're trying to climb the corporate ladder, not hike up a mountain," says "Carry a briefcase or messenger bag -- and if you need something for your gym clothes -- invest in a nice-looking gym bag." Are hose a required accessory for the workplace? Local law prevails.
"In some cultures it is acceptable [not to wear stockings] in the summer," Glass says. "I say if you're working in air conditioning, why is this a struggle?" If you have aspirations for a corner office, she says, wear stockings -- even in summer.
Man sandals are out in force this summer, and "Casual Fridays" even lure some into the workplace. Most fellas know not to wear them with socks, but for some guys we've seen, socks might be a good idea. Gentlemen, as you blaze this bold path, realize that your feet are on public display.
If you cannot meet the bare minimum -- clean feet with neatly trimmed toenails -- put on socks and shoes. Oh, how we love our flip-flops. The concrete canyons of the city echo with the flipping and flopping of rubber thongs.
Whether from the dollar store or Niketown, everybody has a pair in the closet and a spare in their purse. But unless you're a lifeguard, they are not appropriate for work. Good thing there are better sandals for the workplace than something your pedicurist gives you for free.
Glass takes a hard line, saying no to open shoes of any kind in the workplace. "Flip-flops, mules, slides -- any [shoe] that makes noise is totally unacceptable" for the workplace, she says. "No clomping, no slapping.
" Ready to cop a plea? If you admit guilt to a fashion offense, it is possible to negotiate a settlement. Casual can still be professional.
For men, a nice shirt and khakis is middle ground. For women, there's a vast middle ground between button-down professional and sex kitten. "The less skin you show, the more professional you'll be, so no exposing your belly, no see-through tops and no sleeveless tops," says business etiquette expert Barbara Pachter, author of NewRules@Work: 79 Etiquette Tips, Tools and Techniques to Get Ahead and Stay Ahead.
"Anyone who's moving up needs to look the part," Pachter says." But for women, it's even more important. It's too easy to discount women in our society.
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