Dot can take her liquor that is for sure, she demolished about half my bottle of VSO and didn't seem to be affected. Jules was on the G T's and was looking a little frayed at the edge. I was on the VaT, but I was being thin with the vodka, I was still fragile after Kate's little adventure and didn't fancy throwing up, or fainting.
I just acted a bit more sozzled than I actually was. I managed to get the subject onto sex saying that I thought many relationships suffered because of a poor sex life. 'In fact' I said, 'I bet that is at the root of Phil and Cas's problem.
' I knew full well that it was, but could not let that confidence escape. Jules said that she didn't agree, that our relationship had survived a period of abstinence, and that caused Dot's eyes to raise and look at me. I said 'only just, I was about to leave, we did come close, and It was sex that caused my unhappiness.
' 'Is that all men think about, sex?' Dot asked.
After I had stopped laughing I explained that no, it wasn't all that men thought about.
Sometimes they thought about football, sometimes food. The perfect day would be eating hamburgers watching naked women play football and then getting rodgered by the wife, girlfriend or mistress, as applicable. Jules laughed and said that men don't have mistresses these days.
'Oh' I commented, 'that's a blow, cus I had thought I might get myself one if that is allright.' 'No it bloody isn't' she replied, I was looking straight at Dot as she spoke and smiled as Dot controlled the small frown that appeared on her face. 'Perhaps sex education ought to include sessions on how to please your partner, I mean we were told nothing, either by school or our parents,' Dot commented.
'Get Dale to be a teacher,' Jules chipped in. 'Oh, you think he is that good then?' Dot asked.
Jules just smiled and mouthed 'wow'. 'Excuse me ladies' you are liable to embarrass me here' I laughed. Jules was slumping in the settee, using my shoulder for support, her hand resting across my lap.
Dot was in the chair facing us, and I think it was contrived, but a series of crossing and uncrossing her legs had left her skirt 'north' of her knees, and her panty clad fanny on view, facing Jules and myself. Rather unpleasantly she was displaying a series amount of cameltoe. I wondered if Jules would say anything.
So far she hadn't, I wondered if I dare? I didn't.
Dot decided that she needed the loo and got to her somewhat unsteady feet and went to the downstairs cloaks.
She left all the doors open on the way and we were treated to the full symphony of her urinating and wiping. Jules looked at me and whispered 'sorry, sometimes she is a bit of a slapper.' I just replied that 'I was glad that she had some pants on.
' 'Fat lot they actually covered up' Jules said. 'No, true, I think I do now know exactly what her fan looks like, fat.' That earned me a punch.
I responded with a kiss and pushed my lap up at Jules. The slight pressure of her hand was enough to start the arousal process and the inevitable erection started to push at her hand. 'Stop it Dee' she said, moving her hand, 'not now.
' 'I told you I had half a mind to have you on the lounge floor,' I responded. 'Stop it' I was instructed. Dot returned, staggering more than she had when she left, her voice a little slurred.
'Another drink?' I asked, she nodded as did Jules. I got up and refreshed their glasses, giving both a healthy slug of alcohol.
I just had a tonic. As I returned I saw that Dot had slumped down in the sofa next to Jules. As I passed them both my drinks, Dot turned to Jules and said, 'If he's so good, then you ought to lend him out.
' I turned back to get my drink hearing Jules say that she didn't think so. Dot took her drink in a single draught and told Jules that she was being selfish. Jules was getting a bit cross telling Dot that wives don't lend out husbands.
Dot retorted that sometimes husbands didn't need to ask. This was getting out of hand. I went into the kitchen and sorted out a cheap glass and dropped it into the sink so that it would smash loudly and exclaimed 'Oh Shit'.
That got Jules running. I put my finger to my mouth and said loudly, 'Watch where you walk, there's glass everywhere.' I went back to the lounge and asked Dot to sit tight for a few minutes while we cleaned up the glass.
Hopefully my diversion would enable the subject to be changed. Dot had again managed to get her skirt above her leg and had her cameltoe on display. She was drooping in the chair and looked as if she was about to lapse into drunken unconsciousness.
About fucking time.
I went back into the kitchen and told Jules that Dot had passed out and that I had broken the glass on purpose as Dot was getting just a little obstreperous. Jules just shrugged and said I'd have to help her clean up the glass and then get Dot upstairs.
The glass was no problem, but helping a miniature whale upstairs when she is too pissed to stand is not easy. I also had to help Jules get Dot partially undressed, down to bra and pants. That was no easy feat either and I saw far too much pants in crotch crease for my liking.
Eventually I managed to get Jules alone in our bedroom and started peeling her clothes. She put her finger in the air and said wait, and wandered naked to check that Dot was out for the count and came back and flopped on the bed. I moved her ankles apart and sucked hard on her perineum and then lapped gently at the crease at the top of her leg, she loves that and when she is tipsy, she loves it a lot.
We sucked and we fucked and then we sucked again before falling asleep in a pleasant spoon, my waning cock nestled nicely between the cheeks of Jules arse.
How to Find Free Porn, or other interesting stuff
If you are one of those people that like exploring the private lives of others, or rummaging around other peoples files, here is a little something that might keep you amused. You can be very adventurous, and on different days the same searches will give different results, that is the wonder of the web for you.It might distract you too much, depending on what you find. You can change the search parameters for whatever you wish to search for. You can often find pirated movies, hacked and cracked software as well as pornography, but be careful what you download.
You can specify both the file types and a search word to find something more specific in the file name. For example to find the Paris Hilton video tape:
So You can play with the search strings, and change the movie types (.mov etc) You can even use it to find mp3 and mp4 files.
Simply adjusting the search strings in Google will allow you to search for other hot topics, such as Jessica Simpson, Amanda Tapping, or even Reese Witherspoon. Enjoy
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