it would have bought your old bathroom furniture if you d thought to put it on eBay. Today, though, Ford is in what economists call a right old pickle . As an investment opportunity it s up there with a semi on the Gaza Strip.
Its shares are listed as junk, biscuits are banned in board meetings to save money, it has sold Aston Martin, it is shutting 14 plants, shedding 30,000 jobs and business articles speak of there being no obvious solution. One analyst I spoke to said: If it were a corner shop, it would have gone bankrupt years ago. So how does it find the cash needed these days to design an all-new car and tool up the factories to make it?
Realistically that costs a billion and a billion is one thing Ford does not have. In fact, a billion is what Ford is losing every four or five months. The last I heard it was trying to borrow 10 billion just to stay afloat.
You have more money than Ford, even if you are a postman. That s why the new Mondeo contains, as far as I can tell, no new technology at all. The Focus, designed in a bath of cash, had expensive independent rear suspension.
A big advance for that part of the market. The Mondeo has no similar technological leaps. That said, what you do get is tried and tested.
Largely the parts come from the Ford S-Max and the forthcoming Volvo V70. And all Ford has done is screw them together properly. You d be amazed how solid it all feels.
It s much wider than the old car and a full five inches longer. Perhaps that s why it s 175kg heavier and that s like adding the weight of a medium sized motorcycle. The upside of this swelling, however, is that it s truly huge on the inside.
The back in particular is roomier than a concert hall and the boot is big enough for a game of football. I must also say that it s exceptionally good looking. Colleagues in the motoring press have called it pretentious but I disagree.
I think it s balanced, handsome and that all the trinketry is well chosen. On looks alone, and interior space, it leaves all of its rivals trailing. And that s before we get to the price.
Whatever model you choose is going to be thousands and thousands cheaper than anything from Audi or BMW. What s more, the Ford should be cheap to insure as it has special deformable panels on the back that boing back into shape after a bump. And the news gets better still when you go for a drive.
Because of the size and weight, it feels a very different car from the old model. The fun, the joie de vivre, has gone. Even the 2.
5 turbo I drove doesn t encourage you to stick it into a bend and revel in the electric responses. Now, it feels refined and comfortable. And for that reason you should avoid the optional sports suspension.
It d be like teaming a well cut tweed suit with a pair of training shoes. Ford has done a good job with this car an outstanding job when you realise how strapped for cash it is. The only real problem is that downmarket badge.
Or is it downmarket? It was, for sure, when Mr Blair came to power. But since then Mondeo man has jumped ship, which is why in Britain today the BMW 3-series is by far the bigger seller.
No one wants a poached egg any more. Everyone wants drizzle and jus and Ian McKellen in King Lear. It s a pity, really, because as a result Ford is teetering on the brink.
It may well go and if it does we shall be waving goodbye to the company that gave us the Model T, the GT40, the Mustang, the Sierra Cosworth, the Escort RS2000 and the Cortina 1600E. it would have bought your old bathroom furniture if you d thought to put it on eBay.
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